distinctions i can’t help but make.!

there is a tranquility in acceptance.
i have a tiny pocket of peace now,
even though the tumultuous rage
of my emotions thunders on without pause.
the pain still scars, slowly but surely.
my heart still beats too hard to self-contain.
it’ll burst soon, i know it. but some older, jaded,
and helplessly wise little sprite within my abdomen knows
that it can re-form and reform.

well, i’m not going to lie to myself anymore.
he’s never going to be consumed by me,
and occasional flares of passion are momentary sprinkles
of color among the simple gestures of affection
we’ve grown accustomed to exchanging.
of course it’s not the same. but we walked through three years
of shrieking infernos in order to afford the sweet safety
of our own forest house on the 22nd floor.
we worked hard for this. i’m not going to pretend
that it isn’t important to me, temporal as it may be.
even if we aren’t much to write home about,
we’re still teaching each other new things,
and that’s more than enough reason to continue
to love somebody.

but you… you’re not alone on this.
i know what this is, and i cannot
and should not deny it. nor should you. this?
this is like seeing halley’s comet pass through
the tired sky and knowing that there is a chance,
however small, that it can be caught. no,
not caught, perhaps. but touched. seen.
recognized. loved. it’s no more than a shooting star now,
finite and fleeting, but that bright arrow winking
at the mortals on the ground is an extraordinary
universe up close.
now we know it exists. and no one can keep us
from dreaming that a time might come during which
it will be within our reach.