when..!

When you get to the point where you listen for just
that particular ringtone. 
When the only name you want to see
in your “notifications” is that name. 
When emails from everyone else either dissolve
into background noise or punctuate the absence
of the one message you’re actually waiting for. 
When you post selfies and status updates
in a pathetic/transparent ploy to gain not the attention
of 4,000 followers but just that one follower. 
When the small green dots floating next
to all the other names might as well clatter
to the kitchen floor because that one FB friend
is not “online.” 
When your list of saved voicemails consists entirely
of that one phone number–without exception. 
When all the songs on your playlist are ones
that you either have on endless repeat or greyed
out altogether because they remind you
of that one person who made you laugh until
you cried or made you cry until you laughed. 
When you line up a series of dates only because
it helps to pass the time, the time that seems
to stack up like a pile of old newspapers
or black and white photographs–strewn around
your high-rise apartment where last night’s kisses
leave marks on the floor-to-ceiling windows,
reminding you of what it means to wait
for this thing that arrives on the other end
of a buzzing iPhone. 

When love is still just a game.